I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
