It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize