Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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