We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
