I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
