he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
