haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
