youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
