i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Randomize
