You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize