youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
