i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
