hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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