Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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