He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
