omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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