I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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