Whod you bang
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Randomize
