If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
