No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
