She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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