i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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