Your tits are I can't wait for
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
This is the high leading the old right now
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
