Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
