just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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