so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
