you mean i was at the winter classic?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize