so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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