people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
