the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
