so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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