I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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