All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
