just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We have started to decorate penises.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Randomize
