Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
