Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
