I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize