Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize