so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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