What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize