My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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