Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
