I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
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