Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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