they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
