Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
