Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
smell my finger.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
