Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
