i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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