Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
