if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
When are your genitals available?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
